Why Philosophy?

I recieved my acceptance letter from Warwick this morning with mixed emotions. Not that I don't want to go... I can't wait to learn more. Every time I find out something new I get so excited about it and since there's so much to learn I will spend a lot of time being very excited.

I get bothered though, with the question 'Why do you study Philosophy?' There's never any easy answer to the question, at least not when I'm replying to anyone who doesn't know anything about philosophy. I had a conversation with a relative once. She asked me what the point of philosophy was. I tried to tell her that philosophical thought was important in so many areas such as aethetics, politics and ethics. But she just asked me why I cared and why didn't I just get on with my life like a normal person. I didn't have any answer to that, I just got frustrated that she continued to press me with questions.

Ever since if anyone asks me why I study philosophy I just tell them that it's because that's what I do and change the subject. If I told them that I couldn't possibly do anything else they would ask me why and I wouldn't know why, that's just the way it is. Sometimes I think I should have just done something like studied computing, gotten a job and got married. It'd be nice to forget all this philosophical nonsense as if I'd never opened a book, just deal with normal issues rather than getting entangled in arguments over which ontology is the right ontology and which form of philosophical thought is the most important. I mean, who really cares apart from people who study philosophy?

But I'll do it because I have to do it. There isn't any other way. Perhaps in ten years time I'll ask myself why I couldn't have settled for the good career with 2.4 children. I might have been happy like that. But I don't think I'll ever know the answer. It's just something that's there and it won't go away.

This weekend I'll be happy because I get to read Deleuze and Guattari.

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